New Year's Eve

The end of a year.
The beginning of a year.

I'm happy.
I want change.

I love living here.
I want to move.

I'm happy.
I'm not.

Photographs

I finally saw his picture. I had that uneasy feeling I had a month ago, when I first saw the picture of the inside of the house. I've poured over every snapshot, every detail. I've looked at the background, the furniture, the carpet. Anything to learn something about him. I can't help thinking though, that the more I learn, the more I shouldn't.

Don't mix real life with internet life, right?

New fun ...

A couple of weeks ago I started my own internet chat room. It's been a lot of fun to learn. And lots of work. Nearly 3 dozen folks from an old site have joined. It's nice to be able to spend time with good, fun, funny people. I'm amazed at how quickly it's grown. I also have a .com site which links to it.

On Turning 46

So, today's my birthday. Spent the whole day with my family. Mom was visiting, and the kids were real troopers - didn't complain once about being with us. Even my sister and brother-in-law joined us for brunch this morning.

It's been a wonderful day. Since we don't know how much longer we have Mom, it's been even more special that she could be here with me. I'm trying real hard to be as accepting of this as she is, but it's difficult.

I'm blessed in so many ways, but especially with my wonderful, beautiful family.

Thank you lord for first 46 years. I'm proud of every one of them. Here's to 46 more??

Nights In White Satin

Nights in white satin, never reaching the end,
Letters I've written, never meaning to send.
Beauty I'd always missed with these eyes before.
Just what the truth is, I can't say anymore.

'Cos I love you, yes I love you, oh how I love you.

Gazing at people, some hand in hand,
Just what I'm going through they can't understand.
Some try to tell me, thoughts they cannot defend,
Just what you want to be, you will be in the end.

And I love you, yes I love you,
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.

Nights in white satin, never reaching the end,
Letters I've written, never meaning to send.
Beauty I've always missed, with these eyes before.
Just what the truth is, I can't say anymore.

'Cos I love you, yes I love you,
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.

'Cos I love you, yes I love you,
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.

Another great day

Today was gorgeous, I headed out early to the water. It was really crowded with surfers this morning, you can tell it's getting warmer. Spring break is just around the corner. I'm glad summer is coming, I'm still feeling a bit water logged and look forward to several months of no rain.

Rejuvenated

What a beautiful day, finally. Warm and sunny. I cleaned a little, and worked on the patio. Decided to run to the store, but since the store is just 2 blocks from the beach, well, ended up there for an hour.

It was so good to just sit, watch the waves, and think. I have missed doing that sooo much. And as usual, since I do my best thinking there, it was very helpful. Some situations became more clear, and a few decisions were made.

I almost feel like I've been cleansed. Maybe the shore for me is what confession is like for catholics.